India as I am seeing it.

In how much time, disillusionment can come in? In how much time, one can get from a high to a depression? In how much time, we can move from happiness to despair and vice versa? And how much of these fluctuations, good for the mental health of a citizen?

India, these days, tests the mental resilience of a normal and hapless citizen. The citizen is clueless about, whether to mourn or celebrate the display of various facets of life that the country offers its citizens on a daily basis. To say the least, the country is divided. The problem is not this fact. The problem is the confusion of the citizen, who does not even know, with whom they are standing in solidarity.

Every TV channel, every newspaper - is affiliated to some party or other, it is so obvious looking at them, that no one needs to guess with whom they are standing. Trip to Moon and Mars, Rape of girls by people in power, SC having time for all types of cases, except some that need to be avoided, it feels, PM appearing in a discovery channel episode, and almost all India marooned in floods, and ironically drought, as well. What do I celebrate and what do I mourn? Do I celebrate Hima Das or do I mourn the travails of Duttee Chand? Do I move to a liberal India or do I go back to my traditions? Do I take what was not being done 2000 years back as a yardstick for all acts that I don't do today or do I forget the religious colours of green and saffron?

I have no answer, and I feel there are people like me, who are equally at loss. The people, who want to be proud of their country, but bureaucrats and politicians make sure that we feel like a fish out of water. The people, whom we vote for, go and join parties that we are fully against. The people whom we vote for, do not deliver the promises, for which we voted for them. What is the solution?

What is education?

And I am not talking of literacy, which is completely different. I am also not talking about the education that gets one a job so that one can earn a living for self and the family.

For me, the primary role of education should be to build sensitive human beings, who should be able to earn a living for themselves and their family members whom they support, with a peaceful co-existence with others in the world. But is it happening? The existing education system has restricted its role to that of helping the individual in finding a job or career, with scant regard to the humanity aspect and the society at large. It has actually divided the world, instead of uniting it.

Education, as per me, should make individuals complete human beings with good physical, mental and emotional health, who respect human dignity and are ready to help others on as needed basis. I will omit spiritual health here, as any mention of spirituality in this society is immediately linked to religions and polarity start taking place as one’s conditioning.

Some international schools have recently recognised this dysfunctional aspect of education and have added subjects related to ethics and so on… in their curriculum. But will it help? It will not, unless we go in the deeper aspects of how a human mind thinks and how it is conditioned by the society, in which it lives. The education system in its present form, instead of making the society better, is actually dividing the society. You can actually see this in the attitude of most of the students from prestigious institutes like IIMs, IITs, AIIMS etc towards the students in the same field from other unknown colleges. The pride of acknowledging oneself superior to others can never make society a better place.  The pride of being a winner is fine. Unfortunately, most of the times, it turns into arrogance.

The family, the society - all love a winner, an achiever. But, what happens to the non achiever and the failures? Do they feel themselves a part of this society? Or is there a deep grudge of not being acknowledged? And where it starts? – Right in the school, where one is rewarded only for achievement. The psyche of the young mind is greatly influenced by these recognition of their activities and it keeps on getting intensified in their mind when they grow up. The achievement takes the front seat.

And who does not cross the fine line of right or wrong– in trying to or becoming an achiever, a winner? And does not the society and the family keep a closed eye or in some case, even justifies the acts of the individuals in pursuit of the so called achievements.  

So, who draws the line of something – being correct or incorrect?

Education system has to realise the fact that all individuals are different and they should not be and cannot be measured with the same yard stick. Since, we do that in majority of the society, the world is becoming violent as the winners and failures have their own conditioning for which they are ready to die and kill. The peace can only prevail, when the difference in individuals is accepted and maybe, even respected by everyone in the society including its leaders, rather than making every individual come out of an assembly line making them ready for a job market and/or follow the same ideology.

The task for the real educationist is not only to provide literacy, and some professional knowledge by which people can earn their living, but to remove the inequality from the mind of the people. Removing physical and social inequality is an unfinished work and let the educationist do not rejoice till that is eradicated. The inequality of superiority and inferiority in the mind is the real culprit of the conflict in the society and till the education system is able to cover it up, all exercises in educating the world will continue to be futile.

I am not an educationist and I have no solution to provide you with. But please note that all of us have a unique role to play and that is the reason why we are different. Trying to mould each child in the same pattern is like expecting the children to come out of an assembly line of a process industry with exactly the same traits.

Education has to get into the mode of encouraging diversity. Then only the people with diverse talents will feel welcome in the society and there won’t be any conflict of acceptance in them. And if we are able to remove the conflict of acceptance from the people’s mind, education would have realised its true potential.

Keep trying!!!!

Women

I am not on a search. If at all, I am on a search, it is the search of my own self. Who am I ? Why do I behave the way I behave, why do I think the way I think?

I have no guru, nor am I looking for one. My teachings come from watching my own actions and observing the intentions behind them. It started long back in 1989, when my daughter was born. One look at her and I was convinced that life cannot be fathomed. A small child turned my life. It was the power of love - her love for me, my love for her. It had no expectation.  It was just there, complete in the knowledge that whatever comes, this love will always be there.

She grew up in my house - my only child, with no restrictions, no ambitions, no looking in future, no repenting the past. NO instructions to do this or that...She was there, just to be happy and make us happy. And she made us immensely happy. During those days, I realised that if you love and if you don't expect anything in return, the love multiplies, as it is not selfish anymore. And then I fell in love with life. Each and every person became a subject of love. Loving came easy to me, as was not looking for any return. I am in love with everybody. By the way, she stays close in Pune and comes home whenever she feels like. There is no restriction for her at all in whatever she do....and if you see her, you will be surprised by the sensitivity she has for this world and its lesser citizens. She works for a NGO's programme - as a Programme Manager

And in that raising a child, I realised our conditioning and..... came out of that, a bit slowly, day by day, coming out, all the time...

For me, women became the most lovable human beings on earth. I know the pains, women go thru even in living a normal life. I love women, not as an object, but as my companion, my partner, my strength and everything, in between.

My Body, My Friend ... for years

Yesterday evening, when I was having my normal rum with paani at the terrace in my flat, I realised that I have not talked to my body for quite some time. Realising it is better to be late than never, I began my speech. By the way, whenever I and my body talk there is actually no sound produced. We actually share, in frequencies that cannot be measured by the present day instruments. Most of the time I initiate the conversations and the body just responds in a way that makes me feel that it is listening.

Today, I wanted to know from the body as how it feels to have a name – rajeeva ranjan. Is it proud of me or is it indifferent to that fact? Who knoes, it might have even heard Shakespeare stating – what is in a name? The body seemed to be more in a listening mode as it did not respond. Since the body had not shown any inclination to respond, I continued with my sharing. All my thoughts were directed towards the body.

In my internal silence, I told the body that today when you are indifferent to my name, how would you feel that day, when I will move out and people would call you – The body? Would you have any consciousness left in you at that time to realise that I have moved out. Me, who is your company, for last so many years; Me, who has looked after you most of the times and also abused you once in a while. Will you remember me with a happy or a sad feeling? In those moments will you describe me as you or should I describe you as me? Or do I start my next journey with the statement that for 54 years, me and my body were good friends. And then one day, the relationship disintegrated and we could enjoy each other’s company any more. We decided that it was time to part, time to move on to maybe, some other realm, some other world, looking for another body who will be happy to let me share its inner most place for sharing experiences not possible in this world and the existing body merging with the five ingredients of the universe to come up fresh, as a new body, ready to host a being, who was coming here for experiences that were not experienced so far by the body also.

Body was mostly fine with me, though it did complain of my earthly nature sometimes. I did realise what the body was conveying, but my visit to this world was for something in which I had no option but to follow my earthly nature, irrespective of my body’s discomfort. I really do not know whether my body had any clue before allowing me to settle inside it as what was my agenda in making it as my resting place.

After some time of sharing, the body wanted to participate and as I told you, somehow I can intuit when body is getting into sharing mode. The body had no complaints with me though it would have preferred more pampering rather than being just stoic about the flesh business. It actually was telling me that whatever you could do, was because of the fact that I supported you. It was not blaming me or something, but I could sense that it was telling me not to feel too great about myself, as I had an equal willing partner, who was as instrumental in taking me today, where I am. Since me and my body share a very cordial relationship, we share even the most difficult things with great simplicity. There is no love lost, there is no heart burn – when me and my body talk. Long back, when we started the relationship, we decided not to have separate names, so both me and the body were known by the same names. It was actually comfy most of the times. Sometimes, we had the tussles also, when body had its own demand and I had my own needs & perception. Even when we differed on issues, it was never a big thing. We had realised that we were different and hence it was perfectly normal not to have identical feelings on all issues. This relationship of me and my body actually taught me lots of things in life, from where I could get the best out of my relationship with almost everybody. Though the body knew about most of my relationships, there were certain relationships about which the body had no clue. Those were the relationships that were beyond definitions from the society point of view.

We never talked about those relationships.

My body was masculine and I was genderless. I could feel like both the masculine and feminine, but the body was devoutly masculine. It had a pride in its masculinity. There was a time when I looked after my body, as much as anybody could. The oil and the cream and what not! And body did respond. It never let me down in my 54 years of life. It carried me effortlessly to places that I wished to see. It gave me the pleasures, which only body can give. The respect has been mutual. But everything good or bad, has to end and so is true for this relationship also. I would not forget my body and I hope that my body will also not forget me. But is it is sure that after we say bye, we can never ever meet again.

During this sharing, when three large rums got over, I never came to know. The only thing that I remember was a slight pain in my chest and then, suddenly for the first time in my life, I could see myself standing – looking at my body…..

It was not a sight, one could be ecstatic about, but I felt an inner calm , a sort of homecoming in that sight and then I left – wishing my body – the best and thanking him for the support. I actually did not know – where to go, what to do? But I marched on. It was a usual thing for me throughout my life, whenever I did not know where to go or what to do, I just marched on……

Life

There is sadnesss in existence. The sadness that comes when one is not blind to the reality. The sadness that comes from seeing the indifference of the same species towards its less fortunate counterparts.

This sadness comes as we get attached to things in life - ideas, beliefs, likings, dislikings etc in addition to the people, objects, hobbies etc.

If we can remain detatched to these, there is no sadness, there is no pleasure. But, is that a life? Why dont we find out???

Fear

Life starts and finishes with fear. When we are child, we are not afraid of anything. Then, fear meant only the fear of getting physically hurt.

But, then we grew up and started getting afraid. Afraid of losses, afraid of losing – losing our possessions - of wealth, health, reputation, knowledge and everything that we accumulated in between, in our day to day living.

The society and the civilisation actually was formed as we were afraid, to stand alone. It was fear that brought us together initially and then it became our life. It graduated from simply surviving to conquering, it started finding happiness in its victory, in its expansion. And with this happiness came the brutality of seeing hapless conquered people and feeling great about our own strength. We started multiplying by procreating, by conquering so that we become invincible. The desire started gaining strength and its endless march is still on.

Why do we accumulate? Whether it is money or knowledge or good wishes? Why it is becoming out nature to accumulate? Because we feel that what we have, is what we are. So, the more we have, the more we are.

Fear’s origin is in forgetting our connectedness to the universe. It is in forgetting our true self and seeing us as individual members of a caste, society or country. Till we remember this as our reality, we are bound to be in conflicts.  

Love & Sex

Love and Sex:

We all talk of love. We swear of our love to our wife, to our husband, to our society and so on. But we don’t know what love is.

 
For most of us love means catching hold of someone or something and not letting them go. Possession, for most of us, is what love means – whether it is a person or an object. If the item or person is lost, is taken away, we feel the loss and we claim to be suffering as the object of our love is no more with us.

 Love is not barter. It does not demand anything. It is not on conditions. It is a flow. It is not a destination. It is to be felt from the heart, not analysed from the intellectual mind. It is not governed by the rules of society or government. It has its own calling. If you listen to it, you forget yourself and in that forgetting, the love blooms. Love, with it’s own rules and regulations that are completely different from the ones, made by human beings, can govern you, if you allow yourself to be trampled by this. It gives ecstasies, but it also gives you the acutest suffering. It is for the brave to love. For a commoner, it is better to love in its limitations, where you laugh in your smiles and where you cry in your sad expressions. Love allows you to laugh to the maximum and cry to the unbearable.

 
In one word – Love comes in your life, when you forget yourself. The most memorable moments of your life were, if you care to recall, when you felt at one with the universe. There was NO separation between you and what made you full of love. It might have been the sweet smile of a beggar child on the street, or the kiss of your spouse or the natural scenario of a mountain or river, or just a plain field with a solitary tree. You may have been moved so much that you actually cried in your happiness. You were grateful to the universe that you experienced such a phenomenon. During those moments YOU did not exist. Those are the moments of Meditation.
 

Till YOU are alive, you cannot love. Because then, you will be governed by the analysis of your mind – Can I love? Should I love? Is he worthy of my love? Does she respond to my love? What, if, ….. and, so on…..

 

And what is Sex? Sex is an act between two people, when they feel so close to each other that they decide to shed all their inhibitions, including clothes and melt into each other to get the most pleasurable experience available to mankind.

 

Sex is the physical act, that takes you - out of YOU. It is a moment of extreme pleasure. You forget yourself during those moments - if the act was voluntary, if it was not forced on you. During the moments of unforced sex, you feel a pure love that is only possible during meditation. But then, why the entire world thinks of sex and is scared of it, at the same time? Why almost all the religions in the world, except may be Buddhism, ask its followers to have a tight control over it? Why the rules of the society limit this act?

 Religions banned or limited its use, as its use will take people away from the God. People will be happy, satisfied if sex was not restricted and very few satisfied people, actually go to temples/mosques and churches etc. The Government made lots of rules and regulations regulating it, but in which part of the world, sex is not a problem? Both religion and Government will lose their power, if sex is not controlled. It is told that societies will go berserk if we don’t control sex. By the way, where is society heading right now, with all these controls?

And the beauty is, the same head of religions and society will not think twice before indulging in the act, if nobody was watching or if the act was in complete secrecy.

 

The problem is in the mind. For a male, it is his power; for a female it is her bargain tool to turn the power in her favour.

The act of sex takes place for bearing a child, for pleasing one’s lover even if your heart is not in the act, for clearing any debt, for earning money, for fun etc. But, very seldom, it is enacted for love. Very few times, one wants to melt oneself in her lover’s arm.

 But, if you love somebody, you would like to have no barriers with them, so people in love all over the world gets into sexual act without thinking. But if your object of love is not married to you, it makes you feel so guilty that you want to keep away from the act as much as you can - the guilt of not following society’s rules and regulations and one’s own conditioning.

 

And, for the people, who would like to have sex with whomever they meet, it is a show off of their achievement, as people in other walks of life show off their cups and medals.

And in the last, is woman only an object of sex alone???

 NO, a woman is an object of love, and NOT Sex. But, most of the males can’t differentiate between love and sex, so they try sex. If they get, they continue, if they don’t, they go away.

 
In addition, the human psyche is interested in power, and for men – having sex with women gives a sense of power to them. So, the more, the better….

So, whether to have sex or not, you will have to decide yourself, whether the person who wants sex with you, is which type of person and take your decision accordingly!!!!